Can there be a gentle breakup?

For the most part, you’ve enjoyed dating this person. They are sweet and kind. Really, you can’t find much wrong with them except that you no longer want to date them. Sound familiar?

People can find themselves in this precarious situation where they no longer want to continue in a relationship. It becomes even more troublesome when the person you no longer want to date is not a bad person at all. You look at their unsuspecting face and think what an awful person you are for not finding him or her more desirable. This is the ultimate torment to the person who must have the talk.

True, you could continue to see if you revert to feelings of days gone by or if you are game player, you could toy with their affection and keep them as a standby (awful). Remember when you all couldn’t hang up the phone for fear that you would die? Now your death vision is more about how awful it will be to look upon the face of someone you see as a dear friend, but not someone you love. How do you break the news?

Unfortunately, the shortest distance between any two points is a straight line – tell the truth. If you are halfway decent, put yourself in the other person’s place. Would you want that person doing the “sympathy dance” with you? I don’t think so. It’s going to hurt no matter when you them; so, get it done as quickly and as gently as you can without going overboard. Telling the truth actually gets you some points later. You may not be admired today, but weeks or months from now you might get a thank-you call or letter.

Why a thank-you, you may ask? Well, many people breakup and never say a word. They just disappear leaving you to wonder what you said or did wrong? That’s a horrible thing to do to anyone. However, in this insensitive world in which we live, people do unfathomable deeds to others with the hopes of never seeing you again.

So, if you’ve outgrown a relationship, be man or woman enough to say so. Don’t leave your companion hanging on. Their time is just as important as yours. Furthermore, if you believe in karma, you wouldn’t want this to happen to you, would you?

Best to you!!

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